RE: Meal policy

To: Offspring
From: Management
Re: Meal Policy

Lately, there seems to be some confusion regarding the Meal Policy at Torgesen’s Bed & Breakfast.
For your clarification, we have reprinted it below.
You will note that there is a new section on 'Snacks'. This was added after careful consideration and zero consultation.
All changes are effective immediately.


Meal Policy

• There will be one common dinner provided for all lodgers each night.
• You will eat it.
• We do not care if you do not like tomatoes.
• If you finish everything on your plate, you will get dessert.
• If, after tasting the dinner you cannot choke it down, you may (a) make yourself some toast or (b) try your luck at the neighbor's; either way, dessert is off the cards.
• There will be no food or drink (other than water) issued once you have brushed your teeth; therefore, we would recommend eating a second serve - tomatoes or no tomatoes - at dinner time.
• Snacks will be available throughout the day.
• 'Snacks' are defined as: fruit, nuts and carrot sticks.
• If you really are starving, you will eat them.

Signed,
The Management

p.s. Management loves you. xoxoxo